February 14th. Who decided this was the most romantic day of the year?
Media? Sex & The City? Either way, for me Valentine’s Day was a bit like prom: too much hype, loads of expectation and a bit of a let down once it happened. If you’re partnered, you’re programmed to want grand gestures (that don’t usually happen) or if you’re single, you’re expected to ‘Bridget Jones’ it.
But why is everyone so focused on romantic love? What about platonic, family, self? Often we focus on the love we give each other more than the love we give ourselves, and your self-care routine has probably been put on the back burner during January and February with work, family, school and general life. It’s 2020 and I think it’s time to change that, make yourself a priority and treat yourself like your OWN valentine.
Use Valentine’s Day this year as the perfect reason to re-centre and refocus – some suggestions below to get you started (Cupid's bow not required):
Do nothing
But like… actually nothing. Turn off your phone, sign out of emails, get off social media and spend the evening entirely to yourself. You’ll be surprised how energised you feel spending this time without any distraction. Cook a delicious meal or get a take-away and watch a film, read a book, life admin, whatever it is that you haven’t had time to do recently!
Acceptance
“Are you seeing anyone?” Probably a question you were bored of hearing over the holidays by older relatives? We give so much power to romantic relationships in our culture that being ‘coupled’ up is presented a means to an end – like this is going to dictate your happiness. If the word ‘single’ or the idea of Valentine’s Day brings up dread and negative emotions - it’s time to reclaim and redefine the word ‘single’. Take notes from Emma Watson and ‘call it being self-partnered’.
Pamper yourself
What’s more romantic than a bubble bath, a glass of wine and ZERO distractions. Valentine’s Day is the perfect justification for pampering yourself. Whether your self-care is face masks, a self massage or simply taking a little longer on your skincare routine - put some time aside to indulge this evening. Take your self-care one step further and set time aside to do this on a more regular basis. You deserve it.
Buy yourself flowers
A lovely friend of mine told me to ‘always buy flowers for yourself’ and I won’t lie – I’ve never looked back. I highly recommend you make this a regular habit.
Treat yourself
Well this was probably going to come up wasn’t it? Don’t wait for someone else to buy you the {insert gift you’ve been eyeing up here}, now is the time to take matters into your own hands. Neal’s Yard have made things a little easier by offering a gift of your choice for $4.99 when you spend over $100 online! So you can stock up on your essentials AND be rewarded for it. Treat yo’self.
Is it just me or was Valentine’s Day way more fun when you were younger?
Handmade cards, hanging out with your girlfriends, going out dancing and most importantly – no pressure! Bring those feelings of fun and independence back. Round up your girlfriends, sisters, parents and celebrate all the other types of love in your life with these ideas for your community!
Movie night
Easy. Cheap. Fun. Get loads of snacks and ask your friends round for a Valentine’s movie date (FYI you don’t have to watch rom-coms). Add to the slumber party vibes with facemasks, cozy PJ’s and spiked hot chocolate!
Spa day
Haven’t seen your Mum or sister since Christmas? Plan a day at a spa or treat yourselves to a massage! If that’s a little bit of a stretch this time of year, set aside an hour or two to go and get your nails done or a quick in-store facial.
Pot-luck
Got a big group of friends or family who have no plans? Suggest a pot-luck and get everyone to bring a dish and have a sit down meal! Perfect for students or if you’re still feeling the pinch after Christmas.
We have our entire lives to be surrounded by other people. If you’re single or recovering from a broken heart this Valentine’s Day, use this weekend to encircle yourself with love.
Just remember that you are the constant in your life – so spoil the love of your life (you!) this Valentine's Day.
